27.1.07

Next, *Reset*, or Quit

It's quite amazing to me how doing what you are not comfortable with soon makes you comfortable. A great weekend with friends is being had, jamming, gaming, substance-abuse and watching all sort of weird and wonderful things on a wide-screen projector.

Life is getting better.

16.1.07

Seriously, you are all idiots!

I am not going to crack open a sixer of long, drawn out diatribe lager on the many things that irritate me about public transportation, mostly because I am a major fan of it and the system I ride regularly. However the one thing that consistently grinds my gears are the incorrigible assholes who insist on blocking the middle and rear doorways of buses packed to capacity as people try to get on or off at stops. It's nothing more than apathy and entitlement in my mind.

Instead of people able to flow off the bus creating space before new passengers fill said space, these human pylons stand with that disconnected, off-in-space look on their faces as people struggle to push past them getting on and off. This causes people around them to have to move in ways not often completely platonic in order to create enough space for people to move past them, all the while, the bus is stopped longer slowing everyone down.

The solution to this dear reader is simple and something I practice myself...

STEP OFF THE FREAKING BUS TO LET PEOPLE OFF, THEN STEP BACK ON WITH THE NEXT ROUND OF PASSENGERS!!!

It's not rocket surgery, nor does it require more than two steps and the willingness to find a new place to sit or stand when getting back on the bus. There is the added benefit if you are someone who might want to try practicing courtesy in that you can also hold the doors open while people get off the bus after you have stepped off. But I suppose that kind of selfless act is lost these days.

It's inconsiderate, lazy and just plain stupid and I wish the transit security would yank people guilty of this act off the bus and make them get back on again to symbolically beat it into their skulls. They sure don't have problems removing passengers for not paying, so why not for making other people's commutes more difficult?

2.1.07

Unsatisfied

As with many people, the new calendar year has made me both introspective and retrospective about the last year as well as the past few years and I'm left feeling unsatisfied in some ways. In hindsight it's easy to spot mistakes and shortcomings and ponder how things would be better had more concentration and effort been invested. Running with that and exploring the possible reasons for why that didn't happen has led me to a few conclusions.

1. I don't like what I'm doing professionally

Thinking back over the past two or three years I can't think of much that I've enjoyed about my working hours other than a handful of interesting technical tasks and perhaps a having had a small positive influence. In some ways I've been fooling myself into thinking I was doing something worthwhile and bettering myself but now it really looks like I've let myself derail a career and become mired in futility.

2. My free time is like a void

Now, save for things like learning to kayak and having quite a few successful paddles along with some great outdoor adventures last year, I've spent most of my free time doing very little. Spare time of course is not generally meant to be filled with activities that have a definite goal in mind, sometimes you just have to watch a season of The Venture Bros. on the couch, but when I think about the things I like to do I don't think there has been anywhere near as much enjoyment or really, engagement in some time. Without those things, I don't think I've improved in some activities the way I want to.

3. I need to concentrate

One of my biggest faults is that I can really space out. Not just for short periods where my attention floats away but more on a sub-conscious level where ideas, interaction, life, random thoughts and stress cause me to have the attention span of a gnat. I think this is one of my biggest problems and as an example probably accounts for some of the absent-mindedness I've had with regards to work and my problems with it. Perhaps I just haven't noticed how much I don't like it because I've been distracted by a small part of it, the latest task to be done or some shiny object.

It's a vicious cycle of a lack of concentration that causes problems in life which occupy my mind to further the lack of concentration. The Aikido and Bushido practitioners are right, live in the moment (ed. Not *for* the moment though).

I can think of a couple of other things, but these are the big three that if addressed will probably go a long way to improving / rebuilding me.

For the work situation, I already have a plan in mind that I won't talk about until it finally starts happening. Not just because I don't want to let the cat out of the bag strategically so to speak, but in this case, I'd rater let action speak louder than words. But suffice to say, I'm quite excited about the plan I've hatched.

My concentration and free time activities are both starting to improve as of late. I have really cleaned up my diet and started exercising regularly a few months back and the change it has had so far has been great with nowhere to go but up. Running and yoga are my new addictions and I'm starting to be able to focus more. I need to keep improving that and apply it to hacking, playing bass and yoyoing. All the things I'm really good at if I spend more than just a few minutes a day doing them. I'll return to GTD for basic life and work management. I'm happier when I have myself organized and perhaps it will also help me focus overall since it inherantly works to in part lower your distraction level to improve productivity.

So, down the road I go, re-reading the last paragraph that explains some recent effort makes me feel better about the situation now and over the next year. Ah, there is that self-motivation!

As a footnote, yes this post contains wiki links but what can I say? Everyone has a wiki these days and they are generally great places to point to for general information on a given subject.